Prisoners of Perspective
“Some people would rather be “Right!” than Rational!”
-Robert Howard Thomas
American Philosopher, Author, Yachtsman
(1932 –
“You got to get yourself together. You got stuck in a moment and you can’t get out of it…”
-Stuck in a Moment
Performed by U2
Songwriters: Paul Hewson, Dave Evans,
Larry Mullen, Adam Clayton
The recent Tony Award Winning play, “RED!” by John Logan, starring Alfred Molina; is a tour-de-force of writing, acting and staging which gives proof to the fact that there is life, creativity and vitality in live theater.
It’s about Mark Rothko, the Abstract Expressionist Painter, Russian Immigrant, Intellectual and Cultural Critic who obtained the largest-ever commission from Phillip Johnson and Mies Van Der Rohe the co-designers of the Seagrams Tower in mid-town Manhattan. They wanted Rothko paintings to be the standout signature art for the Four Seasons Restaurant. It was to be Rothko’s Crowning Achievement, the thing he’d been reaching for during his entire maturing, category-leading career.
So where’s the drama? Well, Rothko dined at the Four Seasons — testing the environment — and commented that he detested both the place itself and the well-to-do patrons who reminded him of his poor Russian Jewish immigrant roots. A studio assistant commented about the dilemma — taking the sizable commission from people he abhorred — which nudged Rothko into a character crisis — culminating in his decision to rescind the commission and commit suicide.
This is a powerful story about a man who “painted himself into a corner”– and couldn’t change his mind about who he was. When his circumstances changed for the better — he couldn’t expand his perspective to accommodate the enhanced stature, reputation and wealth. Success threatened to destabilize his treasured self-image… And he died committed to being “right,” about his old self — rather than rationally expanding his envelope and with it, his own present time worldview. He was indeed, a prisoner of his own perspective…
“White Over Red”
Mark Rothko
We call this form of mental gymnastics “Success Reluctance.” Of course, not everyone is so irrationally reluctant to confront change, but most people have a variety of new, unusual, challenging aspects of life that they have difficulty facing and resolving. They get stuck — in their “envelope.” Stuck in a previous moment… The thing about a mindset, a worldview, a perspective is that it’s comforting, it’s familiar — gives support to one’s unique “take” on the world. And when something comes along that’s new or threatening, these folks don’t go directly at it or into it. Instead, they stick to their old tried and true point of view and flatly reject the new deal — which would require moving determinedly into the “Now.”
Have you experienced this? It could be a promotion, a move, a new hat, a new job, or a new mate. Maybe a friend or colleague, on being promoted; celebrates the elevated stature involved in the promotion but then fails to allow their self image or viewpoint to rise along with their office. It’s classic: the position changes, but the mind-set stays the same…
Bad luck though. ‘Cause things do tend toward balance, and when one pushes everything they have into a bet on an expiring viewpoint, the backlash is often tough to take. The universe requires a semi exacting correlation between how you see it and how it is… Many people find that dealing with the new circumstances is more stressful than opting out of the game and reverting to how it used to be.
It’s tragic if you know someone who gets “stuck in a moment” and can’t move ahead. Rothko, a brilliant man, who took his own viewpoint more seriously than life itself, was a real theatrical tragedy of course, but also a tragedy in real life. It’s comforting to be “right” about your sense of a previous self. But, it’s better to be rational and moving positively forward in the present.
So how can you handle this — or assist someone else? Here’s a start: If you think it’s worth dying for, get a second opinion. Then, question your premises. Mostly, allow yourself to evolve… Don’t get stuck in a moment!
Most challenges of the new are not as dramatic as Rothko’s dilemma. To our view, each new reality is instead, an opportunity to transcend the envelope of the past. But then there’s still the challenge to embrace the future.
Applications:
1. Individually:
If you find yourself stuck in a moment, get thoughtful advice; then examine all the ways you might resolve the problem with tactics not requiring the end of life. Nathan Hale made a great historical point, but few things rise to that level. Consider simply changing your mind…
2. At Home:
Spouses, parents and children know us awfully well, and they don’t suffer delusions lightly. Is it any wonder that the people closest to us often push us up against the edge of our envelope — to the point where it looks like something has to end? Consider that the death of a self-image need not require an actual death… Push gently, and leave time for the changes to come. Try and avoid putting people in flat out, either/or situations. Leave your treasured people an “out.” And yourself as well.
3. At Work:
You can quit the job — really — and keep your ethics intact. You can tell people honestly how you perceive them, with a little tact. A commission can be rescinded. A position can change; a debate can be joined or concluded with grace and pride. Nothing about a mere commercial transaction should be life threatening. Consider that if it looks like the ultimate act is required; it might be time to take a breath and step back from the edge.
If you, a subordinate or colleague experience that “stuck in the moment, painted into the corner” feeling, take the pressure down and give them and/or yourself a new moment to think it over and revise a perspective. The life you save may be your own.
“And if the night runs over
And if the day won’t last
And if your way should falter
Along this stony pass,
It’s just a moment
This time will pass.”
Dessert: U2 performing “Stuck in a Moment”
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