Right Going Forward!
“A cat who sits on a hot stove top, will never sit on a hot stove top again. And that is well. But she will never sit on a cold one either.”
— Mark Twain
American Author, Humorist and Philosopher.
Yeah, you really messed that up! It was understandable of course. You were young, and aggressive and knew it all… But some people got hurt, and there’s that earlier marriage. That failed business undertaking. And those kids…
So, you pulled up stakes and put it behind you. Decided “Never to do that again!”
The behavior was wrong and damaging. But the subsequent decision was a good one.
You were Right, Then. And there!
But Now, there’s a new challenge… New circumstances, people, job. A whole different gig. And here you are — smart, experienced, seasoned, hungry to contribute. Bursting to use your combined experience and make things better.
And. Nothing.
You’re standing here poised — and stopped. Because you’ve decided to never make that mistake again — not ever! So, everyone is waiting for your contribution, looking at you… It’s your time. You can make this better. You can. You know you can. You’ve seen how this plays out. But you’re frozen. Not out of lack of understanding, but because of your own decision never to risk anything like that again…
Well. So much for the benefit of experience…
Interesting how our experience of having “done harm” may keep us from doing it again, but it also keeps us from helping. So, in a funny way, what was wrong then and there, keeps you from doing what’s right here and now! Ring up another loss as the process continues…
This ongoing dwindling spiral continues until we arrest the process through dialogue, then begin to re-examine our assumptions, premises and constructs to start fresh in the here and now!
Applications
1. In your Life
Have you found a good Counselor? Not one who says: “How do you feel about that?” But one who helps you dig out the assumptions, resolutions and premises you created based on a moment of failure in a dark time… That requires some detective teamwork; but once you see it, the re-integration can happen instantly! Find good counsel. We all need it…
2. At Home
Have you and your partner been through some tough times? Made any firm assumptions or resolutions based on that tough experience? Are they still valid — after all these years? Maybe it’s time to pause and lay down the firm foundation for later life. After all, you’ve changed!
3. At Work
Is your last boss the one that bit you? Are you giving this one a wide berth without good reason? Are you keeping four cylinders on idle because you think it’s too risky to excel? How’s that working for you?
You sure don’t want to do that again… that much hurt, that much damage… But why not take all that experience and give today’s family, neighborhood and workplace the entire benefit of all you know?
You may have been Wrong in the Past, but make sure to be Right Going Forward!
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